The List

The following conversation between Senators Obama and Biden may have occurred after Biden's recent interview with Orlando, Florida reporter Barbara West.

JB: Hello, yeah, Biden here, put him on, please?

BO: All right, Joey, what is it this time?

JB: Senator, Sir . . .

BO: How many times, Dumbo, do I have to tell you?

JB: I'm sorry, Mr. President, but I'm a little flustered. I just finished a satellite interview with some dame from Orlando.

BO: Yeah, so?

JB (crying): She asked me awful stuff, like, real tough questions. She even brought up that thing I said about you not being up to a crisis or whatever. Since when does anything we said before matter? It's not fair; it's not fair! (foot stomping clearly audible)

BO: Mohammed, I mean Jesus, stop blubbering, will you, and remind me again why I picked you? I should have fired your ass right after that fundraiser debacle. What do you want from me now, genius?

JB: My wife is supposed to talk to that bad lady next. Make her go away, please? Please, Mr. President?

BO: Who, your wife or the reporter?

JB: The bitch . . . I mean the news broad.

BO: All right, but this is the last mess I'm cleaning up for you, got that, Joey? You're killing me, goddamn it. And what the hell is it with that forehead of yours? It never moves.

JB: Oh, thank you, Sir, I swear I'll be good from now on. By the way, how will you make her, you know, go away?

BO: Never mind, Joey my boy, but get used to those kinds of people disappearing once I take office. Behave yourself, and I'll show you "the list" I've been compiling. One more knuckleheaded appearance, though, and you'll be on it! Bye-bye Biden! Got it?

JB: Yes, Mr. President, I shall make you proud. I can't wait to see your list. Is that bad man Joe the Plumber on it?